Think of how it feels when you are ignored and your need for connection isn’t met.

Or you are dismissed when hurting and your need for soothing and validation are not met.

Unmet needs evoke a flurry of tough feelings.

Now think of when these needs are met.

When someone you value is delighted to see you.

Or you’re hurting and someone takes the time to listen and respond just how you need them to.

Or you feel safe.

This too evokes feelings, but positive ones. Happiness. Calm. Safety. Even excitement.

Meeting unmet needs changes how we feel – even when we do it using imaginal visualisations.

It is one of the powerful mismatch experiences there is.

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